Selfie 14 february 2025

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i didnt think you could turn

nihilistic during the end of your life

im almost too nihilistic to write this

i dont even remember what i wanted to say

thats the state of my mind and reality now

i havent talked much about it but since

½ year back i cant move my legs

so thats my reality yes or the black of it

anyway i looked up myself

on chinese starsigns again

it said id be ha+py when im 49

in 8 years ill be dead and buried

or rather cut up sprayed weird chemicals in me

deeply frozen and sent to another planet

anyway, in the akashic library you can see the poem

which was supposed to be this

i cant i dont have many superpowers

and everyone seems to have more than me

i miss fountain house i miss so much

does anyone miss me? and thanks

radio totalnormal for taking care

of my heritage or whatever

i like playing computer games

i like being online

i dont like IRL

i dont like normal people

and thats mostly all i meet

even un-normal ones turn

boring in my precense

its all about morph landscapes

only under certain conditions

are people alright

i guess its like that for everyone

dont get much response to my writings

well, theyre so many i couldnt handle myself

and myself cant handle me

anyway, using paper dip now that im

not given anything else

just got to shower which isnt guaranteed

it turned better and worse in various ways

anyway, i can cry now so im female "emotional" then

there was a male nurse at the

hospital who was very dragon-like

he didnt slither in his speech he slobbered

he told me "no you need to continue writing poetry"

so thats what i do here


av För Emma 79 (ris och ros)


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