The point of working out and what it leads to
often when working out we ask ourselves: 1) where is this taking me / am i wasting my time? and 2) i dont see any results. if we apply it to the polar opposites, we get the following. 1) browsing porn leads you over time to watching just more and more perverse shit all the time, until you find yourself on darknet fapping to frazzledrip. 2) what results do you see from junkfood? gaining in weight, mental / physical disorders. then we ask the same things with working out then. 1) to a life which doesnt need to be "stimulated" all the time by outside forces, which most of the time costs money, and even more importantly, time. "time is the essence of life" - nitin sawhney on the concept album "prophecy". since you dont need to "pay" for stimulation, you get naturally inspired from just exerting your body. "all truly great thoughts are concieved through walking". with porn the want to need (w2n) is near instantaneous if youre at home or alone. at least with junkfood you have to walk to the grocery store, if its 30 mins to and forth, you wont gain that much. when i stopped this practice, i weighted my most ever: 140kg. i figured if i did (a plethora) of drugs, i wouldnt need food, but this was not the case. but later, after my second suicide attempt, which has left me unable to move my legs, it did sorta work: no one flirted me with at the housing, so the only thing on my mind, for at least a quarter of the time since 2 years ago, was attributed to 1) not eating too much 2) working out. 3) was my addiction to MMORPGs, which, after getting banned enough times, ive now just given up. i dont see the point. you slave away clicking to gain some EXP / GP / items, but so little time conversing with people. and as i realized after the bloodclot 2 months ago, im not lonely anymore. so i dont see the need. if youve followed me you know that i originally started playing computer games again after a huge 15 year hiatus, because bella left me. the pain was just too much, i had no idea what else to do. and when she left me the second time, it got even worse. i was used to talking to her all day, saying goodnight, kissing her goodmorning. and whenever i tried to talk to people who lived around me, they just fled away. what to do? of course, start doing even MORE drugs. success! people started talking to me, and my controlling grandmother had moved southward. i finally got some action after a whole 4 year hiatus. she was just like bella and as beautiful as rhianna. i didnt need any meds when i was around her, as her aura healed me. but i did need to smoke with her, then we started drinking, leading to sex. and. maybe im happy my grandma stopped me. my teeth were almost falling out. anyway. i got sorta offtopic after awhile. but wouldnt you know, this is the first writing ever, inspired by working out, i think, for 1 hour or more today. without having the computer (or anything) on.
av För Emma 79 (ris och ros)
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