The story of-how i met julia and bella

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so what i said in a vid today if you dont wanna watch em alllllll.

basically, i remember now.

before i got *any* OCD at all people still treated me the same way.

especially at school. 8 fucking years.

except, this is related to when i got my first computer.

nothing strange then. except a computer in 1994

costed like 20000kr. uh. thats more than a full salary.

except my dad was desperate to give me one (i didnt ask for it).

to teach me that stealing a few coins from him was BLOODY MURDER.

so he wanted to teach me a lesson. except im not a junkie so

i got nothing of his knifesouth creole.

i know there are people who are close to you who

manipulate your whole reality.

so he bought a stolen property

from his bestie at work for 4000

(he used to have several phones

which he often didnt answer

because of paranoira)

except, ghost in the machine is real.

so i got the energy from him.

not much later i made my first

pic with a demo of photoshop 3.0

it was an illustration of the gamma radiation from a black hole.

then i wasnt sentient so i didnt know what i created.

before i started with drugs in 2019 i still wasnt.

i just made shit and had no idea where it came from.

i was told that i was the greatest photographer in sweden.

but just like my mum i am cursed to not get recognition

or money for my art. that changed with fountain house

and radio totalnormal. but the only reason it happened

is i was taking higher and higher doses of 3 different

neuroleptics. risperdal (questionable med against

an everexpanding definition of "psychosis")

some liquid sleeping med that wasnt "addictive"

except it was a tiny vial which you easily OD'd on

its halflife was like 12 hours so even if you slept

for 8 hours (i slept perfectly before and still do)

you were a zombie during most of the day. right.

theralen. then an anti anxiety pill that worked

the first time i took it then never more.

my body gets resistant to things quickly even

phenomena and music. this is related to hyperlaxativity

(a psychiatric term you wont find any documentation

of it online) which really just means im a pisces

in the moon sign. the taurus sun sign just means

your outer appearance and behaviours it has nothing

to do with your inner thoughts workings your organs

your soul. and even when having sex, both julia & bella

said "do i feel like a black hole inside"? and like i said

recently the only reason i got together with them

is i started taking drugs. for julia coffee and cigs

was enough. to get on bellas huge frequency i needed

to get a tattoo and literally put aluminium acetotartrate

on it. then also played with the smartphone at work except

i cant handle them they ruin me in a few minutes.

i was also drinking coffee and the day before i tripped

on homemade opium. anyway everything clashed together

but synchronicity is the only way to find someone

that means something to you. anyway as for the nanochip

it has as many good as negative properties. just now

i was gonna go to sleep, i turned off the comp, rested

literally 10 seconds, turned on the comp again, and

in that time i had renewed energy. i cant explain this

in any other way. the chemichal dousing made the black

ink leak into my bloodstream so it was like i had

injected gasoline. again i dont do drugs i see no

point in it but since i got the straight edge tattoo

the exact opposite happened as many things in my life.


av Heartgold Worldstone (ris och ros)


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